BEING ALWAYS RIGHT

October 23, 2015

Somebody said today that she is always right about the things that she claims.  I do admire that person’s courage and confidence but I think to myself, how good it would be if I can say the same for me.  I do try to do my best in everything, but as what always happens, it seems that my best is never good enough.  There is never enough time, and I never have enough pair of hands to do the things demanded of me. 

At work, people always seem to clamour for more of the documents, the reports, and the money claims that are due them, and they want it fast, quick and very soon.  As much as possible, as far as it is within my power, I try really hard not procrastinate in my work.  And since I am often forgetful, during the whole 20 years I’ve been formally employed, I actually have a stenographic shorthand (my own version of it) checklist and diary of day-to-day tasks, weekly, monthly and annual planners of tasks, assignments and projects to do.  But alas, I often make mistakes and had to do countless revisions and adjustments.  (Good thing I was schooled and trained as an accountant, or else, I’d really be in a bind).

When I was a student, except for studying for exams which I frankly hated my entire life, I do my best not to procrastinate on projects and assignments.  I try to make as much copious notes as I can so that I have something to scan while cramming for exams.  At home though is another matter.  I’ve been used to Mom’s nagging my whole life, and apparently, she has gotten used to me being the main procrastinator in the family.  Really, home is where one can let loose, get down, unwind and be a slob.  Our yin and yang at home sees Mom being the eternal OC, and me being the eternal opponent to one who is such a stickler for order and proper arrangement. (Hehe...=)).

This procrastination has caused me many times to make countless mistakes and errors that I wished I hadn’t done, because often, it is the source of my stress, and I’d get nightmares from it.  However, I realized as I get older that these mistakes have made me more prayerful and a little bit more careful every time.  My first-grade teacher once said that even though I knew the lessons well, I get mistakes during the exams because I was careless.  And my whole four decades of existence has been an arduous journey of making countless mistakes over the years, and slowly—very slowly, learning to be a wee bit more careful next time.

And for all these people, I am eternally thankful.  They believed in me and trusted that even though I oftentimes am not right, often make mistakes, maybe fall hard from it, but I am willing to learn the lessons the hard way and continue on with my journey with better conviction to do good and do better next time.

Actually, I am happy with being a person who is not always right.  It means I am still a work in progress, and that there is still a lot more room to grow.  For me, that holds more promise than the belief that I am perfect now.  Thank GOD I am imperfect, because it means a perfect GOD still has a lot of work to do in me, still has a lot of challenges for me, and still has a lot of blessings to give me for the rest of my days.